The alarm went off this morning but I kept sleeping, though the radio was still playing. I was in that sleep/wake state that you have early in the morning when you really are not prepared to face the day -- sort of wishful sleeping.
I was still in that state when NPR began its story on the hypothetical Supreme Court case, McCain v. Obama. It is a project going at some university to help clarify election law in case of a 2000-esque result in the upcoming election. (I think that was what it was, I was asleep).
But as I lay there asleep, absorbing the story on the radio, I was convinced, CONVINCED, that it was the day after election day and we were still waiting for results. I really believed that. The weird thing about it was how it made me feel -- so scared and sad. Somehow deep in my sleep, I recognized all of those awful memories and feelings from 2000. The aftermath of that election was just the worst, most divisive time for our country, and even in my sleep I knew I didn't want to go through it again.
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That very bizarre time of national crisis in 2000 is doubly seared into my consciousness because it was when my father was dying, as well. I spent every day at the hospital with him, for some time, and the news was just so weird and so bizarre that it strongly penetrated to his hospital room, and even to his sharp, but now shattered, mind. My father had had one cerebral hemorrhage by this time, and his thoughts were mixed up. There's a story about that, but I now am inspired to post it on my own blog. Look there! Anyway, yes, that was a grey, static, weirdly oppressive time. And it gave birth to these last eight years of civic tragedy.
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